Today I'm having a hard time with foods. I want so bad to eat the things I love. Such as chocolate, Mexican food, and stuff with tomatoes in it. I want a Dr. Pepper so stinking bad! And it's so hard to watch others eat the things I want. Like tonight my mom ate chicken fajita nachos. It has grilled onions in it and as she was eating them I wanted some so bad. My heart breaks every time I see something I can't have.
I have an analogy. There is this puppy at your feet and you have a burger and french fries in your hand. Well this puppy has the cutest look on his face and so you reach down and pet him. Now that puppy has it in his mind that he is going to get some table scraps. But then you don't give the puppy anything. That is pure torture to that puppy.
This is what I feel when there is food around me that I want and can't have. It is pure torture to me. I want so badly to eat the things I used to eat. I will defeat this one day and will be able to eat things not all the time but rationally. I need strength to get through it. I can still taste a Dr. Pepper when I see one. But one day there will be a cure and I WILL be normal again!